Personals Which Have Appeared in Israeli Papers

Yeshiva bochur, Torah scholar, long beard, payos. Seeks same in woman

Worried about in-law meddling? I'm an orphan! Write. Nice Jewish guy, 38. No skeletons. No baggage. No personality.

Are you the girl I spoke with at the kiddush after shul lastweek? You excused yourself to get more horseradish for your gefilte fish, but you never returned. How can I contact you again? (I was the one with the maror stain on my tie).

Shochet, 54, owns successful butcher shop in Midwest. Doesn't believe women should be treated like a piece of meat.

Female graduate student, studying kaballah, Zohar, exorcismof dybbuks, seeks mensch. No weirdos, please.

Jewish businessman, 49, manufactures Sabbath candles, Chanukah candles, havdallah candles, Yahrzeit candles. Seeks non-smoker.

Israeli professor, 41, with 18 years of teaching in my behind. Looking for American-born woman who speaks English very good.

Couch potato latke, in search of the right applesauce. Let's try it for eight days. Who knows?

80-year-old bubby, no assets, seeks handsome, virileJewish male, under 35. Object matrimony. I can dream, can't I?I am a sensitive Jewish prince whom you can open your heart to. Share your innermost thoughts and deepest secrets.Confide in me. I'll understand your insecurities. No fatties, please.

Jewish male, 34, very successful, smart, independent, self-made. Looking for girl whose father will hire me.

Single Jewish woman, 29, into disco, mountain climbing, skiing, track and field. Has slight limp.

Shul gabbai, 36. I take out the Torah Saturday morning. Would like to take you out Saturday night. Please write.

Attractive Jewish woman, 35, college graduate, seeks successful Jewish Prince Charming to get me out of my parents' house.

Divorced Jewish man, seeks partner to attend shule with, light Shabbos candles, celebrate holidays, build Sukkahtogether, attend brisses, bar mitzvahs. Religion not important.

Back to "Books for Jewish Children"

Back to Lori's Mishmash Jewish Humor Page

Back to Lori's Mishmash Humor Page

[an error occurred while processing this directive]